New Brunfels, Texas
Here is an idea I'm sure won't occur to anyone else. It's a hot Memorial Day weekend so let's go to the number one rated water park in the world. It's called Schlittenbahn, which means toboggan run.
Because of our advanced age, we get in at the same rate as children under 12, which seems oddly appropriate when you stop to think about it. It's definitely a place for young people with tattoos and children. We see thousands of people waiting in short and long lines with us, but no one else is close to our age. They may have only sold two senior tickets all day.
We go on a bunch of fun tube rides and down a variety of spiraling tubes and slides. At first we can't figure out how we can both ride, so one of us ends up holding the camera. Eventually we get smart and stuff everything we don't want wet in a rental locker.
The rides have names like Master Blaster, Soda Straws, Congo River, Wolf Pack and Black Night. They have a pool that generates big waves for body surfing. They have dueling water cannons and a five story waterfall. You can bring your own picnic in, but not if it includes and glass or alcohol.
This was one of my better ideas. We stop at a Sonic on the way home for a Sonic Blast for me and a hot fudge sundae for Mrs. Phred. A perfect summer day.
A short river runs though the park. The river originates in a spring and we see thousands of tubers taking the two mile float. They're almost wall to wall on the river. It's a warm summer Texas holiday weekend. Why not?