Search This Blog

Sunday 1 February 2015

This Parrot is Deceased!


Mr. Praline: Look, I took the liberty of examining that parrot when I got it home, and I discovered the only reason that it had been sitting on its perch in the first place was that it had been NAILED there.

Owner: Well, o'course it was nailed there! If I hadn't nailed that bird down, it would have nuzzled up to those bars, bent 'em apart with its beak, and VOOM! Feeweeweewee!

Mr. Praline: "VOOM"?!? Mate, this bird wouldn't "voom" if you put four million volts through it! 'E's bleedin' demised!

Owner: No no! 'E's pining!

Mr. Praline: 'E's not pinin'! 'E's passed on! This parrot is no more! He has ceased to be! 'E's expired and gone to meet 'is maker! 'E's a stiff! Bereft of life, 'e rests in peace! If you hadn't nailed 'im to the perch 'e'd be pushing up the daisies! 'Is metabolic processes are now 'istory! 'E's off the twig! 'E's kicked the bucket, 'e's shuffled off 'is mortal coil, run down the curtain and joined the bleedin' choir invisible!! THIS IS AN EX-PARROT!!


Owner: Well, I'd better replace it, then. (he takes a quick peek behind the counter) Sorry squire, I've had a look 'round the back of the shop, and uh, we're right out of parrots.

Mr. Praline: I see. I see, I get the picture.

Owner: (pause) I got a slug.


As I finally fast dance with Mrs. Phred down at the pool, the 1964 movie "Doctor Strangelove" comes back to me. I scream, "Mein Fuhrer, I can dance!" and she cracks up...you had to see the movie to get the reference to Peter Sellers' best performance....I shouldn't have waited 50 years to fast dance with her...


Ken takes us sailing on the Coyote. Mrs. Phred steers the boat.


We pull into Marina Jack's in Sarasota to fill up on diesel and get the holding tanks pumped out.


Ken at rest


Suddenly life is complex again . We're taking a cruise in April from Fort Lauderdale to Saint Petersburg, Russia.. After that we train back to Paris though Moscow, Minsk and Berlin...so I have two months to learn Cyrillic characters, the Russian language , Polish and German...book hotels, understand the subways, learn train schedules and identify cultural points of interest and good restaurants...my head is exploding...


After the .French open, we fly back home and take the RV cross country to Seattle for a flight to Alaska on July 20th for the halibut and salmon...


We plan to spend August and September driving across Canada to New England and down to Florida by October 1st.