Some Assembly is Required
Mrs. Phred found a swing set on E-bay. She asked me to set up an account with E-bay and Paypal and buy it for the grandchildren. I do my due diligence and discover that the vendor has over a 99% satisfaction rating.
It takes a day to create the accounts and establish my identity. At first American Express rejects my purchase with Paypay, fearing identity theft. I clear that up, but then Paypal rejects the purchase, noting that American Express turned me down.
Meanwhile, over on Ebay, my confused vendor writes, wondering why I want two swing sets.
I turn to a friend who orders a third swing set on my behalf with his well used Paypal account....we cancel my orders. I give my friend an old-fashioned bank check (there are still some in an old file in the basement).
The transaction is eventually consummated and the swing set is shipped.
When we arrived the swing set was in two wet and soggy cardboard containers. There appeared to be thousands of wooden, plastic and metal pieces.
I am attempting to dry out the 20 pages of assembly instructions. The blurry cover page suggests allowing two men two days for the construction.
The swing set pieces fill the bed of my son's old Ford junker pickup truck. I need to get busy. There are three days until Christmas. I'm on my own and a day late, if not a dollar short.
HO HO HO!