Crop Circles

Wichita, Kansas

Mrs. Phred and I dress all in black and check our equipment list:
- 200 feet of rope
- Stakes
- 3 foot planks with attached ropes
- Laser pointer
- Protractors
- Night vision goggles
- Camera

We decide on dinner at the Texas Roadhouse before heading out to the wheat field. It’s really crowded for a Thursday, so we drive west of town and find an empty restaurant called the Siesta Lounge for dinner.

After dark we park the Toyota and unload our gear. It’s going to be hard minimizing footprints in the muddy field. I follow her and step where she steps.

Suddenly, we look up and see a huge glowing saucer shape materialize in the clouds. I snap this one picture.

We feel a strange floating sensation and lose consciousness. When I wake up I find myself naked and strapped facedown on what appears to be an operating table. A group of small gray creatures with large black eyes approach. One appears to be holding a probe of some sort.

Somehow we can understand their thoughts. They are tired of being blamed for cattle mutilations and crop circles. We’ve been swept up in an alien crop circle interdiction program. They implant devices will make us very sick if we even think about making crop circles again

We lose consciousness once more and awake next to the Toyota. We dress and go back to the RV.. “Everybody Loves Raymond” reruns are on the TV.